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Vee: When I met James, one of the first things I did was compose a song about his hair. It went a little something, like this...
Biblical in proportion
Contained by no man
JAIME'S HAIR
Well, it sounded a lot better when accompanied by the djembe I couldn't really play.
And it still rings true- even though the coiffure has changed many times over the years, this man's hair is an incredible source of inspiration for me.
It inspires me into a rage.
The worst phase, by far, was The Pompadour. I know retro was really popular and everything, but people forget that men slept with HAIR NETS back then. This was to keep from completely destroying everything their hair touched. James did not want to replicate this less than manly part of the era, and proceeded to turn all my linens into oil-infused messes that smelled a lot like a slaughterhouse.
THAT would be the lanolin -or sheep diarrhea, as I understand it- that he insisted gave him that Ken-Doll shine.
Even though I'm super scared of that fucking electric shaver, I'm happy the multitude of pomades, gels and magic creams can go in the garbage where they belong.
Biblical in proportion
Contained by no man
JAIME'S HAIR
Well, it sounded a lot better when accompanied by the djembe I couldn't really play.
And it still rings true- even though the coiffure has changed many times over the years, this man's hair is an incredible source of inspiration for me.
It inspires me into a rage.
The worst phase, by far, was The Pompadour. I know retro was really popular and everything, but people forget that men slept with HAIR NETS back then. This was to keep from completely destroying everything their hair touched. James did not want to replicate this less than manly part of the era, and proceeded to turn all my linens into oil-infused messes that smelled a lot like a slaughterhouse.
THAT would be the lanolin -or sheep diarrhea, as I understand it- that he insisted gave him that Ken-Doll shine.
Even though I'm super scared of that fucking electric shaver, I'm happy the multitude of pomades, gels and magic creams can go in the garbage where they belong.
Jaime: In the early days of our relationship I was treated as a kind of foreign invader in her apartment, and was prohibited from touching things unduly or moving about too much.
One night I got up to use the washroom, as happens to the best of us from time to time, and in my stumbling through the near dark I happened to thrust my hand through the curtain that served as her closet door and inadvertently grabbed a tangled handful of black, clearly human, hair.
One night I got up to use the washroom, as happens to the best of us from time to time, and in my stumbling through the near dark I happened to thrust my hand through the curtain that served as her closet door and inadvertently grabbed a tangled handful of black, clearly human, hair.
Even over the sound of my ear splitting scream, you could hear my balls retracting into my body at speeds that make a mockery of our understanding of physics...
